(The Path) You Only Live Once

Go Off-the-Beaten-Path

The most confusing times in life happen when you're on a path that isn't yours, but you haven't realized it yet. This isn't some automatic realization, either. It takes an intentional process to figure it out. That's why so many of us spend huge amounts of time and energy going in the wrong direction.

Every decision you make has consequences, good or bad. It drives you closer to a certain kind of life, one that either fulfills you or doesn't. How many of us actually design our lives with intention? Once I realized I had a choice to be more intentional, the possibilities felt totally overwhelming. yikes.

Define Your Damn Metric, Lu!

It all started with figuring out what success actually means to me. No career or life path will make you happy if you don’t know what genuinely makes your soul light up, without the external noise of what you think it should be.

I moved out at 18, worked like hell on another country.I spent a couple of years constantly burning out and overworking, and I wasn't even sure why. I didn't have people around me pushing me to question that, until I slowly started to on my own.

I realized I would never feel successful without genuine joy and fulfillment in my daily life, i was just a rat in a cage.. For me, those come from a specific set of things.

My happiest days weren’t those where I was present in the big business deals or hit a milestone that looked good on social media. They were days where I got to spend time with people I love, read, write, explore, create for its own sake, have great conversations, and travel (cliche right?!).

Your instincts are screaming - are you listening?

If we all are chasing fulfillment, my personal definition includes certain elements. No one ever taught me to stop and define what success looks like, just so I could design a life that provides it. It has been a deeply personal journey to dig deeper. It showed me clearly which directions and decisions would shape my life in the most rewarding way. I recommend this. 10 out of 10.

When you feel stuck or unhappy in your career or life, you need clarity more than anything else. Clarity on what exactly would make you feel most fulfilled and why.

A big part of this is shedding those limiting beliefs about life and work, which I'm still working on. Once you know what you most deeply want your everyday life to look like, your personal vision, not one you’ve swallowed from family, culture, or the internet, the nicest gift you can give yourself is to intentionally shape your life to create it.

Guess what? It's you, you're the North Star.

I think a lot about this: I owe it to myself a life well-lived. There is no reason not to do everything in your power to give yourself that.

This is about truly understanding what you personally want your path to be like. Then, doing what it takes to get there. This image of your ideal daily life becomes your north star. You measure every big decision against it. It is the best way to know you’re heading in a direction that’s completely true to you, not one dictated by anyone else. That's how you avoid finding yourself stuck in a life that isn’t yours.

It’s harder than many of us think to discover what genuinely makes you happy versus what you're just telling yourself makes you happy.

No More Ghosting Your Instincts. Repeat.

Learn to listen to your body and to trust yourself. This goes for work, relationships, friendships, anything really . Your body knows when you’re truly excited about something, however simple it seems. Noticing that is the key to getting to know yourself better and giving yourself what you most deeply need.

Once you start looking, the signs are everywhere. They're in your passions, your hobbies, the content you love to consume, and the people who spark that envious instinct because you wish you were doing what they are. Take notice...what are those signals pointing to?

Why are so many people unhappy with the paths they chase? Because most of us are never taught how to truly know ourselves, or how to value that knowledge. Most people haven't learned to be in touch with their feelings and allow space for them to exist. That is the root of the problem. How can you find a fulfilling life if you don't value knowing yourself and your feelings as the ultimate exercise in creating genuine happiness?

Getting inspired by other people’s paths is great...it reminds you of the options you have. But no one's advice can actually tell you what to do, because no one is you.

I’m at a point where I will unapologetically defend any big life decision, any career pivot, if I know I did it because it feels truly right for me. It gets me closer to the path I’m meant to be on. You owe yourself that much. Spending the time to develop that instinct is super important..

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That’s why I love these moments of writing things just for myself. Everyday life doesn't usually give you the time to introspect and get close to yourself. You have to carve it out intentionally.

And back to those limiting beliefs: If something excites you and inspires you deeply, if it feels like play and not work, if you want to do it in your free time just for its own sake, there is absolutely no reason you can’t design your life or career around it. You can build a life that is as fulfilling as possible. Chances are, someone is making a living in those ways, and they had to start somewhere, too. It is possible.

You just need to know what you want and have a general plan to get there. Come on, you only live once.